Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Gregynog...is somewhere in South Wales. Well before I went there I had no idea about it (and I even didn't kown how to pronounce it) at all. But...
We spent almost half week in Gregynog to think our dissertation. In most cases, we Chinese won't go somewhere far away just to think about the brief of the dissertation. But now I think it's a good idear of doing so. The beautiful landscape, the historic building, melodies from piano...Everthing looks so interesting! People live together, stay together, chat friendly. Yes, cheer up! Everybody is cheering! We had a wonderful time. Lectures, balloon-debate, Halloween party...It's so fresh to me, I mean, I have never been to a Halloween party before!
However, something is on under the surface of happiness. I am not worry about the dissertation. It's quite a nut but still can be solved. I found Chinese nearly sit together all the time, and even myself! Most of time we will stay together and then I heard about the words like these: "Chinese always speak and laugh loudly in their own language, but sadly we can't join in." I feel uncomfortable in both way. On one hand I think we are really too noisy in public, on the other hand I think we--both Chinese and non-Chinese have not communicated enough. It's just like the veil-things happen again. People try hard to know each other but we are on the wrong direction. Communicating , in my view, is not just chating with strangers or joining in the new group to let others know you, but standing in others shoes and caring people with an open heart.
I am sad about ourselves. We are too fear to open our heart. We sometimes think there maybe have some gaps between westerner and easterner. Yes it exists indeed. But the most important thing is: We are not into them and they too. I'd like to make friends with people from other countries, I'd like make friends with Ela, Aletha, Chris, Nic, Mariana...as well as my Chinese friends, can we take off our mask and have a talk sincerly? I wish that day will come.

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1 Comments:

At 14/11/06 9:51 PM , Blogger Aletta said...

Hey Lulu,

I recognise a lot in this story... and I mean not the Chinese group in our class! Last year I lived in a big student house in France, but I lived there with another 8 Dutch students. We already knew each other from our home university, and the others already knew each other by having lived together before. I was very much interested in speaking French and get to know my other housemates, but strangely enough I discovered that the presence of my Dutch friends made this very difficult! I know how tempting it is to speak your own language when you are together, especially when you don't speak the other language, French in my case, very well, but I think we excluded the rest of the house by doing so. So they were a bit intimidaded by this large group of Dutch people, while the rest of the house was very mixed, and we tended to stick in our own Dutch group, just because we grew used to it and it felt safe. In the end I did get to know the others, and then it turned out that also they had been interested in getting to know us, like I had been... I guess we all had been a bit shy. We had to cross a border to get there, but in this case it was not a border between east and west, and I think that might neither be the case in our class. We are not that different, and if we are, I think everyone in this class likes that. It has to do with shyness, from all sides, discomfort with the language, and the ease to stay in the group you first fell in. The most important thing is to make an effort, which can be hard, and might have no immediate results... but I think I can assure you that in an international class like ours everyone is as interested to make friends from other countries like you are.

 

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